Comments on: The Kind of Girl Who … flips some dang cups (in a castle!)

By: The Kind of Girl Who … won’t lay off the smack « Not That Kind of Girl

Sat, 26 Sep 2009 13:01:32 +0000

[...] I say I have seen people for-realsies ass-smack, I forgot that one of the events I've witnessed was an old dude in lederhosen doing it to me! So by returning the favor (or trying to) to another German, I wasn't being a too-fresh skeezball, [...]

By: The Kind of Girl Who … drinks deeply of the vile brew « Not That Kind of Girl

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 05:14:46 +0000

[...] am not: despite all evidence to the contrary, a beer drinker. I’ve drunk wine at football games, the fourth of July, and, [...]

By: The Kind of Girl Who … wears her obsessions on her (hot pink) sleeve « Not That Kind of Girl

Tue, 15 Sep 2009 07:07:24 +0000

[...] a girl who not infrequently wears a friggin’ meat cleaver necklace, I’m accustomed to the occasional gawk. Hell, I would have been comforted by an outright [...]

By: The Kind of Girl Who … wears her emotions on her hot pink sleeve « Not That Kind of Girl

Tue, 15 Sep 2009 06:15:40 +0000

[...] a girl who not infrequently wears a friggin’ meat cleaver necklace, I’m accustomed to the occasional stare. Hell, I would have been comforted by an outright [...]

By: annelise

annelise — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 00:58:16 +0000

this is an amazing story and a great concept for a blog! found you through 20sb. welcome to boston, btw.

By: eatingmachine

eatingmachine — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 03:40:03 +0000

that whole post is a fantastic story.

seriously, how many people can say an old man in lederhosen felt them up? epic.

By: Muscles

Muscles — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 03:11:33 +0000

From the explanation of the (classic) cigarette maneuver, I can only assume that Vom Shield doesn’t smoke and only wanted a reason to approach Shieldee for a light. Why not ask her for a cigarette AND a light? Too needy.

I would also be skeptical as to whether the Spewer himself wasn’t just a very dedicated wing man creating the perfect distraction…

By: That Kind of Girl

That Kind of Girl — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 01:54:25 +0000

@The Ex: End of transaction. …or was it? ;-) The smack was a pretty ballsy move on Lederhosen’s part, but apparently that kind of lechiness is what it takes to convince a cop of your marital status. I’ll have to keep it in mind for when I do NTKOG 35.0: The Cougar Years.

Also, glad you asked about the vom shield. I left out a few key details, as I was still pretty trashed when I wrote the post. To wit: the discarded cigarette had not been come about lightly — Vom Shielder had spent five or six minutes begging all the smokers in sight to spare him a cig. And the vom was, I’m guessing, less gross to two people who had been drinking for six or seven hours already. The thing that, to my mind, made the move so spectacular was that it sent a strong double message: 1) “You, madam, may be assured that my drunken attentions are not short-lived and I am freeing up both hands to take this puppy as far as it will go,” and 2) “My lust for you is so all-consuming that it conquers both my need for nicotine and the inevitable future work of bumming yet another cigarette.”

Although perhaps he was even more clever than I thought and just didn’t like the brand of cig he had bummed, and was using this as an out to toss it then guilt her into ponying up a replacement.

I’m not sure what happened to her cigarette, but if Vom Shield is half the man I think he is, he probably plucked it from her mouth and tossed it back alongside his into the puddle. And if the people of Boston are half as boozehoundin’ as I think they are, someone probably subsequently retrieved both cigarettes from the vomit crater and smoked them.

Either way, I want to find this guy and make him guest-blog. (Damn, I wish I’d thought of that at the time.)

By: Alma B

Alma B — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 01:47:13 +0000

Hi there – coming from 20sb. I love your blog!! Such a great idea and very entertaining! :)

~Alma
http://www.almond-alma.blogspot.com

By: The Ex

The Ex — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 22:10:37 +0000

That smack had me all fired up to call Mr. Sketchy Old Lederhosen Lecher a jerkhole pig, but I have to admit it was actually kind of brilliant. The cop is assuaged of your marital status, you get in for free, and he gets to smack a 23-year-old’s ass — end of transaction. Win-win-win! Then your readers get entertained and I get jealous, so it’s win-win-win-win-lose (or maybe -win, depending on how you score it).

I don’t really understand the vomit shield move at all. Was she already done with her cigarette? Who would want to put her mouth against a stranger’s immediately after seeing and hearing vomit leave another stranger’s mouth?