TKOG Whose oath is hewn from the living rock

NTKOG #141: The kind of steadfast Atticus Finchette on whom you can rely to keep any promise, no matter how trivial or lightly uttered.

I am: a slave to convenience, and more than willing to bend the truth to get what I want, so long as it doesn’t directly and severely hurt anybody.

I am not: prepared to admit that I don’t lie quite a bit just for the fun of the thing, let alone to ease my daily burdens.

The Scene: Convenience store, 9PM, the night before I left for Barcelona. Because I am an extremely reasonable and highly intelligent human being, I like to take minor challenges and approach them in the most life-planned way: “I’m getting on a train for a week-long vacation at 7AM? Why yes, I suppose I will watch House until laundromat last-call before even thinking about dealing with the fact that every. single. item of clothing I own is filthily strewn throughout dusty niches of my apartment. Tallyho!”

Yeah, TCOB has never been one of my strong points.

By the time I’d gathered up the shrapnel of the laundry bomb I’d touched off in my apartment, I had fifteen minutes to magically transform a Lincoln into a fistful of quarters. No major stress, as the laundromat I live above (literally above) has a change machine. Which was — of course, broken. Lugged my bulging hamper to a competing laundromat a block away to borrow their change machine before returning to my laundromat, my love. But theirs was broken too! In a moment of desperation, reeking hamper and I lurched into the convenience store next-door and bought a Cadbury Creme Egg, then sneakily requested the change all in quarters.

“You are doing laundry?” the purveyor asked. I nodded and he clarified, “You are doing laundry next-door?” Um, strictly speaking, no. I nodded anyway. “I’ll give you five dollars in quarters but only if you do your laundry next door.” In response to my non-committal shrug, he leaned forward and put his hand over mine. His eyes locked on mine, so wide I could see the pinks around the whites around his pupils. “Do you PROMISE to do your laundry next-door?”

Fuck, guys, the convenience vendor’s oath. He was moments away from assembling a pile of scratch-off tickets for me to place my hand over while I swore.

Entre nous, I had no intention of doing my laundry anywhere but the happy little Tide-scented haven a two-second walk away from my apartment door. Why would I haul my cookies several collective blocks when a great laundromat existed so close I could practically apparate  to it from my bedroom? Still, I caught the man’s eye and I gave him my word.

Realized I’d forgotten my detergent and ran back to my apartment, hoodie pocket a-jingle with ill-gotten coins and hamper clunking my thigh. As I stepped back out my door, the moment of truth: my own laundry mat hummed and glowed mere feet away; my betrothed laundromat lurked dankly far out of sight. Usually I’d feel no pang of conscious about taking the two steps and cleaning my damn clothes.

But I remembered the intensity in the vendor’s eyes, the trembling of his arthritic hand on mine. Goddamnit, my word — just this once — would mean something. I started my resigned trudge to the unknown.

The Verdict: I mean, my laundry got done. Plus, the new laundromat has a Ms. Pacman machine! (On which I’m the top score now. What up.) Also, damned if the convenience store manager wasn’t spying on me to make sure I’d kept my word: every time I re-entered the laundromat to move my clothes to the next phase, he stood on the stoop outside, smoking a pipe, appraising me with surprised fondness. And I waved back to him, not afraid to catch his eye.

That said, I’m totally never going back there. And I’m going to start getting my change from dudes who don’t make it SUCH A HUGE BALLY PRODUCTION.

Tagged as: allston, also HEWN FROM THE LIVING ROCK is about the hottest phrase ever. i want to marry a dude who is as hewn from the living rock., convenience stores, i like to imagine convenience stores are like farmer's markets -- i make an effort to be loyal to vendors as my own little way of supporting the community, laundromat, laundry, they can't all be thrilling, urban living