NTKOG #210: The kind of rabid, screaming soccer hooligan who roots on her team to the death.
I am: utterly flummoxed by the World Cup fever flooding the globe. If soccer’s so cool, why don’t y’all watch it the other 119.5 months of the decade?
I am not: judging actual, year-round soccer fans (ie: Brits). Y’all can grab a drink with me any time. As long as you promise not to talk about soccer.
The Scene: A sunny afternoon in an uber-hipster neighborhood of Brooklyn a few weeks ago, in time for the eagerly anticipated (and brutally disappointing) Group C game between England and the United States.
Although in my normal state, I would have celebrated the game with my usual routine (which to say, finding out about it three or four months later, saying “huh,” and turning back to my gin and ginger), when Justice and Muscles suggested catching the game in an honest-to-pete sports bar, I got psyched.
After all, the one thing Boston has taught me is that the best part of sports is being surrounded by the infectious spirit of borderline-criminally insane fans. Surely an afternoon surrounded by screaming, body-painted fans would give me the soccer bug for once and for all!
What Justice and Muscles failed to mention? We were headed to the only hipster sports bar in the world.
As America recovers from England's first (and only) goal, Mustache Wax and Emaciated Jesus debate which of the two is wearing the tighter pants.
Wait, there's a GAME on?!
Yeah, that’ll get a girl fired up for her first game of soccer.
I gave it my all, but regret to inform I couldn’t dredge up any enthusiasm. I blame this partially on the fact that my British-American dual citizenship confused my alliances (although, for the record, I was quite pointedly drinking Bass beer all afternoon). Plus, how fired-up can you really get when, between shots on goal, everyone around you is passing joints and discussing the finer points of David Beckham’s metrosexuality?
The Verdict: The England/America game may been inconclusive, but let me go ahead and rank this experiment a decisive Hell No. I cut out after half-time to meet Brogre at a little Italian café, where we discussed grad school ambitions in a decidedly unpatriotic, non-hooliganish manner.
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
Yup. I completely agree with you – I have no idea where the rapid onset of “omgees soccer is so cool lets go watch every game of the world cup which we’ve never cared about before” came from, but it was weird. And I also could not muster up an iota of care.
Dear, and I mean this as a sincere term of endearment, as a future soccer mom of the USA, please rethink the David Beckham situation. One always hopes the Beckham Cam is glued to him whether in business suit or shirtless. Sister and I shriek with delight at all sightings.
See, that’s the one thing that appeals to me about potentially staying in New England to raise my family: instead of boring ol’ soccer, my kids could be playing lacrosse and hockey!
Dear, think swirming, screaming child and diaper, snowsuit, socks, boots, hat, mittens, stroller, car seat and BLIZZARD. Your choice, dear.
California it is!
Good choice, dear.
YEAH HOCKEY! ever been to a Bruins game?? best sports atmosphere in Boston IMHO.
No! I hella want to go to one, though! Next season, eh?
I’m totally into World Cup football, even if I have to constantly apologise for England being so rubbish. I have trouble understanding the type of person who spends every weekend watching matches. There are just so many other things to do. Not sure that emaciated Jesus was really there for the footy though.
Try living in the country where the WC is hosted! The week of the opening game, the traffic was a nightmare here! I did attempt to muster some patriotic spirit (where possible) for the games that South Africa played, but other than that, most of the games that I attempted to watch were decidedly uniteresting…
I have a concession: I just watched the closing ceremony for the WC, and I was extremely proud of my country! I’m not interested enough to watch the final game though, and yes, vuvuzelas do sound like bees when blown en masse. They actually sound worse when blown singly!
i just can’t get down with soccer. i really can’t. it’s probably got a lot to do with standard american indifference, but even when i try, the game itself gets to me. for starters, i hate stoppage time. it makes no sense to me. no one ever seems to know how much there is, and it always just seems like they stop playing arbitrarily whenever they want.
oh, and don’t get me started on the horror that is the vuvuzela. sounds like bees. gaaaaah.
Confession: I’d heard a lot about vuvuzelas, but since I haven’t been following the WC, I only had the barest understanding of what they were, and had no idea what they looked or sounded like, or who played them and why. Your comment finally made me go look up a video on YouTube. They totally do sound like bees!
I love soccer. Played it for 12 years. Can’t watch follow it on tv for the life of me, though. Playing > watching, although watching David Beckham in ANY situation is well worth the towels I have to launder after mopping up my drool.
I felt like that before the world cup (for the record – the offsides rule: if you see a guy waving a flag yell “OFFSIDES!” like a maniac and watch the bedlam erupt around you).
What I did realise though was that for south africa the world cup wasn’t about soccer. So yes, I watched every game I could, I got all enthusiastic, learned to blow a vuvuzela and partied with aa square full of Mexicans, the vibe was absolutely ELECTRIC and it was the most fun I’ve had in ages. The world cup fever for a lot of us was abouot rediscovering patriotism, bonding over the event, being proud of our country and just having a blast! And that is my explanation for world cup fever.
I think you just need to find a decent sports bar :)
I complete second this comment! It’s not so much about the game itself (although soccer is a beautiful game), it’s about community and having a good time. There are few sporting events (or any other events, actually) in the world that have the same power as the World Cup (the wiki page about association footbal has some interesting factoids about various wars that soccer has helped start and/or end). Soccer has always been very tightly connected with nationality and patriotism, so of course it makes sense that people who don’t care about soccer just as a sport would get super excited for the World Cup!
And maybe by the same token makes sense that people who don’t have much feeling about displaying their patriotism/nationality wouldn’t understand World Cup fever. That’s definitely an interesting perspective, but one I can only get behind intellectually, not personally.
Question: WC fanatics are the same types of people who would probably get really into the Olympics too, I’m guessing?
No no no! I say this as an American-living-abroad, and WC fanatic this year. The WC is intrinsically more nationalistic than the Olympics for two reasons: It’s tournament-style, building the pride/likelihood of emotional devastation as it goes on, rather than a mess of unconnected events; and where the Olympics-watching culture seems to be all about solemn reverence for athletic ability, the WC is about shouting, getting drunk and (this year!) blasting vuvuzelas in the faces of allies and the opposition alike. It’s less family-friendly, you know? Much more fun, more adrenaline, more glory.
Also, I feel compelled to mention that rather than soccer being watched by Brits year round and all others during WC only, it’s more like Americans watch just the WC while the rest of the world is continuously into it.
I’m British, and want nothing to do with soccer. Give me Rugby Union any day (think American Football, but without the body armour).
now Justice is excited about football, we’re going to start following my home team, Everton, properly. Saying people are lame for suddenly being interested in the WC is sad, because it’s the one chance America has to get excited about a game that doesn’t stop every twenty seconds.
But hockey only stops so burly men can beat each other to pulps! If that isn’t a sport one can get behind, I don’t know what is!
Good point about people’s newfound enthusiasm for football slash soccer, though: if the WC helps people find out that they love the sport and want to watch it all year, then that’s awesome. I get more irritated by people who read the Sports Illustrated WC Guide, choose a team, then get belligerent rooting for slash defending them for exactly one month, only to look on soccer with casual disdain for the next three years and eleven months.